Never Angeline Nørth

As we crested the rise in the freeway, we saw a lot containing trees laid ahead of us. In the lot was a whole scene: the lot & its trees filled with 66 Candle-Witchs scattered about the land, lighting the space full flicker. Flicker. Flicker. In one of the flickers I see you as a still body. Flicker: a body with no movement, a body in the mud, a body all mudcaked at the center of the lot ahead of our car. 66 Candle-Witchs gazelights’ flicker again: You are here again, seated next to me in the car. The mud is empty. Probably in my head is all.

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I'm sorry.

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Ok.

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1. When I left Sea-Witch I entered a vast desert. I survived on the thorny flesh of succulents & completely drained the battery on my 3DS. I dug holes looking for water.

 

2. I didn’t find any water. I found a note scratched onto a scrap of decaying wallpaper.

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3. The note said

 

It’s all about the heart, Never.

 

Stay in love forever.

 

It was unsigned.

 

4. I found a structure in the desert. Maybe it was more like ruins. Under a crumbling floor stone I found a smashed wristwatch, a dried rose, a lego person & a red key.

 

5. I laid on the sand & created next to me a tiny village of sand. Everything in this village looked like a small mound of sand. There was a house that looked like a small mound of sand. A post office that looked like a small mound of sand. A T-Mobile store that looked like a small mound of sand. A church that looked like a small mound of sand. A girl that looked like a small mound of sand. Her dog that looked like a small mound of sand. Her stepfather, who was old & lost his glasses too frequently, who looked like a small mound of sand. A deli. A food co-op. A dresser. A vape shop. A ghost. You could tell them apart by where they were in relation to each other in physical, two-dimensional space. You could tell them apart by the looks on their faces.

 

6. I drank my own piss to live. I began to get very hungry.

 

6. I started thinking about fire. If I cooked my arm & cauterized the stump, that would be a few meals. Just kidding. Lol. I went back to my small village. The deli counter girl was cheating on her boyfriend with the librarian. Everyone was jealous. Have u even met the librarian? So cute. The cutest lil mound of sand everrr.

 

6. I started eating parts of my village. I don't know I was just kind of seeing if my mouth still worked.

 

7. You expect me to die at this point.

 

7. It takes a lot to make a body actually die.

 

8. But then again, sometimes it doesn’t take much at all.

 

9. I grow taller when I breathe in. As I breathe out my body retracts.

 

10. Each day is a blessing.

 

11. Days are the comparison of the earth's orbit around the sun to activities & events that happen on the earth's surface, but you cannot reliably compare the lengths of two events that are happening at the same time. Two events that start & end simultaneously are not necessarily going to be the same duration. This isn't science this is experience.

 

10. Each day is a blessing.

 

13. A plant doesn’t know how tall it will grow. It just trusts its cells to take it toward the light.

 

I’m sorry.

 

Ok.

 

I am in the mud. I have lost our car from around me. I can’t find you anymore. Candle-Witchs approach from every direction. The formerly full flicker lot has dimmed immensely. There isn’t enough light to see by. A cloud passes over the moon.